How to Have Difficult Conversations with Sheila Heen

<p>Stan interviews longtime friend and Harvard professor Sheila Heen about why difficult conversations derail and how to handle them more effectively.</p><p>They discuss the “hero/villain/victim” stories people tell when frustrated, how smart people can listen poorly by focusing on what’s wrong, and why many conflicts are “switch-track” disagreements where each person thinks the conversation is about something different. </p><p>The conversation also covers political polarization, complex identities, and Heen’s course on negotiating money, wealth, happiness, and meaning.</p><p><br /></p><p>00:00 Intro</p><p>03:06 What Makes Talks Hard</p><p>04:30 Avoidance And Timing</p><p>06:53 Family Conversation Traps</p><p>08:54 Hero Villain Victim</p><p>10:06 Respond To Feelings</p><p>12:40 Switch Track Conversations</p><p>14:25 Empathy Versus Assertion</p><p>18:04 Loss</p><p>19:43 Intent Versus Impact</p><p>20:33 Comment Dilemma</p><p>23:15 Intent/Impact Lesson</p><p>27:34 Beyond Blame To Contribution</p><p>29:50 Identity Fuels Polarization</p><p>33:00 Antidotes To Political Divide</p><p>34:50 Marriage Conflicts That Persist</p><p>38:41 Negotiating Money And Self Worth</p><p>42:36 Money Talks For Couples</p><p>49:01 Lifestyle Creep And Meaning</p><p>51:57 Lightning Round Conversation Tools</p><p>54:58 Resources And Farewell</p><p>Check out Sheila at: https://www.stoneandheen.com/training-consulting</p><p>Buy Her Book: https://www.stoneandheen.com/</p><p>Host Stan Christensen has spent his career working as a professional negotiator in a variety of arenas. He has also taught a popular course on negotiation at Stanford University for over twenty years. </p>