Why Is It So Hard for Black Women to Be Average? | Twice as Good, Rest & Overachieving

In this episode, Blake and Ashlyn are asking a question that sounds simple but carries a lot of weight: why is it so hard for Black women to be average?

From childhood, many Black women are taught to be twice as good, overly prepared, polished, resilient, and constantly improving. We talk about what happens when those lessons follow us into adulthood and excellence stops feeling like a choice and starts feeling like the minimum requirement to be respected.

We get into:

• Where Black girls first learn that they may not receive the same grace as everyone else

• Why the twice as good mentality can create anxiety, hypervigilance, and pressure to always be prepared

• How constantly striving can make it harder to see how good you already are

• Why rest can feel like falling behind when your identity is tied to achievement

• The impossible pressure to get an A+ in beauty, career, money, relationships, and motherhood at the same time

• Questioning whether the traditional boxes of marriage, kids, homeownership, and career milestones are goals you actually want

• Today’s Unfiltered Moment on the uncomfortable reality of whether Black women still have to be twice as good to succeed

Today’s Soft Landing: Your life does not have to be extraordinary to be meaningful. You are still worthy on the days you're not impressive, productive, polished, or proving anything.

Where in your life do you feel the most pressure to be exceptional?