Thinking About Divorce? What to Know Before You Call a Lawyer

In this episode, I'm joined by Alex Beattie, founder of The Divorce Planner, to talk about what actually helps in the earliest stages of separation and divorce. Alex is a divorce prep coach who works with people before they hire attorneys or mediators, helping them get grounded emotionally and prepared practically before big, irreversible decisions are made.

We talk about the grief, shame, and identity disruption that often catches people off guard, even when divorce feels mutual, and why slowing down at the beginning can protect you emotionally and financially in the long run.

Alex's web site: https://www.thedivorceplanner.net/

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Timestamps & topics

00:00 – What a divorce prep coach actually does How divorce prep differs from legal strategy and why preparation before calling a lawyer matters

02:15 – Why people want to "just get it over with" Emotional overwhelm, avoidance, and the risks of making decisions from shutdown or panic

03:50 – Divorce as the end of an imagined future Grief, loss of identity, and facing a blank slate you didn't plan for

06:10 – The emotional pain people underestimate Why sadness, grief, and shame still show up even when divorce is the "right" decision

08:40 – How childhood patterns resurface during divorce Why old narratives about worth, safety, and capability come back online

10:20 – Divorce and confidence collapse Questioning your value, competence, and future, especially for stay-at-home parents

13:05 – Reframing skills, worth, and capability Recognizing transferable skills and rebuilding self-trust