
← Stop Parenting & Start Coaching27 jan · 27 min
Are You a "Mild Manager" or "Perturbed Prosecutor?!"
Newsflash! Life isn’t fair. Yep, we all know it! And high school sports and competition are no exception. "It's not fair!" -- the common refrain heard among parents and players and yes, even coaches! And guess what? You are probably right when you're screaming "that is NOT fair!"
But your teen athlete or performer doesn’t needs a parent who coaches them into Blaming, Complaining, Defending and Explaining. This perpetuates a victim mindset!
In this episode, we coach you through the two things you can always control: your perspective and your response. We’ll unpack why complaining feels productive (but usually backfires), how to keep connection strong when emotions run hot, and how to lead like a calm, mild manager instead of an angry, perturbed prosecutor. If you want your teen athlete to build resilience and confidence under pressure, this starts with how you handle “it's not fair!!”
The Timestamps
00:00 The Fairness Addiction
03:14 Playing Time and Parental Perspectives
05:59 The Poison of Complaining
08:45 Understanding Coaches' Decisions
11:34 Perspective and Emotional Discipline
13:30 Important Questions for Parents
16:02 The Prosecutor vs. Manager Mindset
18:59 Modeling Behavior for Teens