Episode 111 - Recovery

Recovery isn't an easy road, especially when you've hurt the person or people you love the most. It makes you feel like you aren't worth living, deserve to be harmed or have the worst done to you, and makes you want to give up or give in. I'm currently going through all of it. I relapsed with alcohol and destroyed my engagement to my fiancée and there's no desire for reconciliation on her part even though I will always cling to even the smallest shred of hope because that's how I'm wired. The pain is extremely fresh for her, what she is going through I can only imagine because it exponentially worse than what I'm going through. Even though it was an addiction to alcohol and I wasn't in my right mindset, having the choice to stop taken from me at a certain point, it was my choice to start drinking again in the first place. I take full accountability, but God do the consequences hurt more than anything I've ever experienced before... and I have experienced a lot of pain. Thank you for listening. If you feel anyone might be going through the same thing or could learn something from this, please share it with them.

-Denis Baldwin