263 - Trauma-Informed Dating: Healing, Red Flags, and Reclaiming Desire

Trauma-Informed Dating for People with Disabilities

This week Kathy takes on a heavier topic: trauma-informed care, and how trauma shows up in dating for people with disabilities.

Content note: This episode discusses abuse and sexual violence. Please take care of yourself as you listen.

In This Episode

What "trauma-informed" means: safety, trust, choice, collaboration, and empowerment, based on SAMHSA's core principles

Why disabled people face higher rates of abuse, sexual violence, and medical trauma

Disclosure dilemmas and the toll of inaccessible dating apps

Red flags, including:

Abuse tactics that target disability, like withholding medication, mobility aids, or benefits

Hearing "no one else will put up with you"

Blurred lines when a partner is also a caregiver

Sexual ableism and the wounds it leaves, from missing sex ed and infantilization to medical harm, reproductive control, and institutional restrictions