E 368: Tammy's Takes #44: Did Childhood Trauma Become Your Personality?

Have you ever stopped to wonder if the person you think you are... is actually the person you had to become to survive?

In this week's Tammy's Takes, I'm reflecting on one of the most thought-provoking ideas from my conversation with author Megan DeMatteo, and taking it one step further. As adult children, many of us spend years believing that our people-pleasing, perfectionism, anxiety, hypervigilance, or difficulty trusting others is simply part of our personality. But what if those behaviors aren't your identity at all? What if they're survival strategies your nervous system developed to keep you safe?

In this episode, I invite you to look beneath those patterns and ask a powerful question that I often use with my coaching clients:

"Who would I be if I no longer believed I had to survive?"

Together, we'll explore how childhood experiences shape the beliefs we carry into adulthood, why those beliefs often feel like who we are, and how healing begins when we separate our authentic self from the adaptations that once protected us. I'll also guide you through a simple reflective exercise that can help you reconnect with the person underneath the fear, the people-pleasing, the perfectionism, and the constant need to prove your worth.

If you've ever felt like you've lost yourself while trying to keep everyone else happy, this episode is for you. My hope is that you'll walk away with more compassion for yourself, a deeper understanding of your survival patterns, and the reminder that you are not broken—you adapted.

If you're ready to go deeper, I'd love to help you continue your healing journey. My signature course, Trials to Triumph: An Adult Child's Beginning Roadmap to Your Healing Journey, is available for 90% off with coupon code THRIVE25.

👉 Learn more at www.tammyvincent.com/course

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