Bucket Emptying: Why Toddlers Have Tantrums (And What Actually Helps)

Spoiler alert: a tantrum isn’t bad behaviour. It’s a developmental event that happens when your kid’s nervous system is really overwhelmed.

When your children have tantrums, it is never a reflection of you or your parenting. It’s a completely normal and age appropriate thing.

So in this episode, I’m diving into the world of toddler tantrums - what causes them, what happens in your child’s brain at that moment, and the five things that genuinely help.

You’ll learn why reasoning never works during a meltdown, how your calm becomes their co‑regulation, why naming the feeling (not the behaviour) changes everything, and how staying close and reconnecting afterwards builds emotional regulation, resilience, confidence and long‑term self‑belief.

If you’ve ever felt stuck, frustrated or unsure how to respond when your toddler explodes, this episode gives you a clear, compassionate roadmap that works.

So take a seat, pour yourself a cuppa, and enjoy the conversation…

Highlights from this episode:

00:58 - The spiky beaker

03:36 - Look through a wide lens

09:10 - Co-regulation

11:06 - Do not try to reason

16:20 - Name the feeling