430: Who Are You Orbitting?

In this episode, Betsy asks, are you feeling resentful? Are you feeling angry? Are you feeling invisible? She advises that the first place to look, is not him. The first place to look is where you’ve centered him and where you’ve disappeared. In the Navigate Method Betsy says, you can’t make a clear decision about your marriage from a place where you’ve already abandoned yourself. So listen in and learn how you can learn to live big!

Transcript:

Welcome to The Art of Living Big, where we explore how to live intentionally and with more joy. I’m Betsy Pake, your host, master, coach, and creator of the Navigate Method. Here to help you listen in to your true desires, elevate your standards, and live life to the fullest. Now, let’s go live big.

Hi, everybody. Welcome to the show today. This week, you’re getting this episode this week. I know on the, on Instagram, if you follow on Instagram, I was going to answer a bunch of questions, and that episode will be next week. Next week I’ll be in Belize for the retreat, and that’s the episode that will drop on Thursday.

So look out for that. Joy and I just had… We had issues scheduling. It became like a chasing each other all day, and so I thought, “You know what? I, I have another thought,” something that we talked about in group. So I wanna get to this. Okay. So there’s this moment, I think, when we stop orbiting somebody else.

I’m gonna explain what I mean here. But it’s, it’s when you stop, , checking their mood before you make a decision, or when you stop thinking about how they’re gonna perceive you before you get dressed. Does anybody else… Am I the only one that does this? Or if you cook. You know, you’re cooking dinner, and you’re like, “Uh, are they gonna like this?”

I know that some of this stuff might sound like courtesy, but I wanna… Just hang with me here, because I wanna, , uh, like sort of separate this out, because I think there is a moment that this awareness happens. If you leave your partner or you’ve made a big change with how you experience your partnership, I think that there is a moment where this orbiting becomes really disorienting, and so disorienting that you’re starting to recognize that there’s, , this piece of you inside here that is…

, you’re not even quite sure where she is. You, you have, like, pieces of her, but she is really contorting herself. You know what I think of, like, when I, when I think of this, is like, you know if you have a cat and then you have, like, a weir