143. Stage 2 Series: “When Every Path Hurts: Getting the Most from You in Stage 2 EFT”

Welcome to the Leading Edge in Emotionally Focused Therapy, hosted by Drs. James Hawkins, Ph.D., LPC, and Ryan Rana, Ph.D., LMFT, LPC—Renowned ICEEFT Therapists, Supervisors, and Trainers. We're thrilled to have you with us. We believe this podcast, a valuable resource, will empower you to push the boundaries in your work, helping individuals and couples connect more deeply with themselves and each other.

In this episode, Dr. James Hawkins and Dr. Ryan Reyna walk into the heart of Stage 2 EFT and ask a hard question: How do you get the most out of YOU when every path forward involves pain?

Drawing on stories from haunted houses, combat medicine, and oncology surgery, they unpack what it means to be the stronger, wiser other—not as a top-down expert, but as a steady, emotionally present guide when clients’ eyes are begging, “Please don’t make me go there.”

You’ll hear how to:

Stay confident and regulated in deep Stage 2 work

Use your own limbic system, intensity, and presence in service of healing

Avoid “over-validating” clients out of depth

Become relentless but attuned when working with shame, trauma, and withdrawer re-engagement

Here are the top 10 points from the episode in bullet format, tailored for therapists:

Therapist consistency is heroic work

Therapists, like elite athletes or Navy SEALs, show up and train relentlessly—session after session—often without recognition, but this consistency is what makes deep Stage 2 work possible.

You are the “stronger, wiser other” in Stage 2