When Healing Becomes Another Form of Avoidance | Tova Citrin

What happens when healing itself becomes something we use to avoid what we're actually feeling?

In this episode of The Shaman Stories Podcast, Jeremy sits down with author, tech executive, energy healer and creator Tova Citrin for a deeply personal conversation about trauma, nervous-system healing, spirituality, creativity and learning to live as your authentic self. Tova spent years exploring different forms of spiritual and energetic healing while simultaneously maintaining a very different professional identity in the technology and financial industries. For much of her career, she kept those two sides of herself separate. Eventually, she realized she no longer wanted to hide parts of who she was. Her own healing journey began much earlier. After experiencing a difficult childhood and later becoming seriously ill with meningitis in her late twenties, Tova found herself questioning who she was without her career, health and the identity she had built around herself. That experience eventually led her deeper into spirituality, energy work and ultimately to Israel, where what was intended to be a three-month stay became more than two decades.

In this conversation, we explore:

• Why healing can sometimes become another thing we chase

• Trauma and nervous-system dysregulation

• Living with hypervigilance

• Why energetic healing alone isn't always enough

• The relationship between the mind, body, emotions and spirit

• Giving yourself permission to actually feel grief

• Turning painful experiences into music, writing and art

• Creativity as part of the healing process

• Learning to stop saying “I'm fine”