If Your Team Stopped Complaining, That Should Worry You, with Suzi Wear

A quiet team can feel like proof that things are going well. Suzi Wear sees it differently. If you're not hearing suggestions, feedback, or even complaints, something is usually keeping people from being open and honest with you.

In this episode, Suzi and Brandon dig into the moment a frustrated employee shows up at your door. The common reflexes are to smooth it over, avoid it, or get defensive and explain the decision. Suzi's read on why: passion is appreciated as long as it's convenient. How you respond in that moment either builds trust or shuts it down, for that person and for everyone else watching.

Suzi shares the story of a high-performing, usually reserved employee who came in visibly frustrated that leadership had made decisions affecting her team without asking the people closest to the work. Her supervisor went straight to defending the process. She felt defeated and went quiet, and it wasn't because she agreed. She had learned that speaking up didn't help.

You'll also hear how to tell a chronic complainer from a real signal, why responses like "let's be constructive" or "you need to calm down" shut people down, and what to say instead. Suzi closes with a simple three-step approach any manager can use the next time a complaint lands on their desk: reward it, mine it, and close the loop.

About our guest

Suzi Wear is Managing Director of Learning and Development Services at Xenium HR. She has more than 20 years in HR and leadership roles, with work spanning employee relations, workplace culture, and leadership development, including consulting for hundreds of small and growing businesses.

Suzi designs and delivers practical training and coaching for leaders. She is a certified coach through the Institute of Social and Emotional Intelligence and recently earned her accreditation in Conversational Intelligence, which shapes much of the workshop content she teaches.

TIMESTAMPS

00:00 Introduction 01:31 Why a quiet team should make you nervous 02:34 How to tell a quiet team from a resigned one 03:34 Why quiet gets mistaken for everything going well 04:25 Why leaders smooth it over, avoid it, or get defensive 05:42 Why passion is only welcome when it's convenient 07:32 What "let's be constructive" tells an employee 08:39 How "I'm so glad you came to me" changes the conversation 09:28 How the power dynamic shapes your response 10:20 How to tell a chronic complainer from a real signal 12:55 Why a high performer went quiet after raising a concern