Ep 136: It’s Safe to Ask for What You Want

It's Safe To Ask For What You Want

How often do we decide the answer is going to be no before we ever ask?

Maybe we assume we're asking too much. Maybe we're worried about what someone will think of us. Maybe we convince ourselves something isn't possible, so we don't even give ourselves the opportunity to find out. Maybe we assume the answer is no, and that feels hard to hear...

This week, I'm talking about feeling safe enough to handle the yes, the no, and giving yourself permission to ask for what you want.

I share a couple of everyday examples that reminded me how often we can make decisions for other people without realizing we're doing it. Sometimes, all it takes to create another possibility is being willing to say, “Is there another option?”

But this isn't about always getting what you want.

It's about being willing to ask for what you want while also being okay with the possibility of hearing no.

A no doesn't mean you shouldn't have asked. It doesn't mean you were asking for too much, that you were wrong, or that things aren't working out. Sometimes a no is simply information. It gives you something new to work with.

We also talk about how easily we can turn someone else's response into a judgment about ourselves, especially when we're already questioning whether we're allowed to want what we want in the first place.

I'm exploring what it means to:

Ask for what you want without feeling entitled to receive it

Stop deciding “no” for other people before you've even asked