
← Midlife Unfiltered17 Apr · 16 min
Why Women Are Running on Empty and How Saying No Can Change Everything
Summary:Are you exhausted from carrying the invisible burdens of household and emotional labor without recognition? In this episode, Heather England dives deep into the societal expectations placed on women, the true cost of mental load, and practical steps to reclaim your agency and voice.
Key Topics:
The origins of the mental load and how it’s patterned from childhood experiencesThe list of invisible tasks women manage daily—from household chores to emotional laborThe impact of the mental load on women’s physical and emotional healthWhy helping is not enough; emphasizing ownership and responsibility in partnershipsThe project management perspective as a tool for sharing responsibilitiesThe importance of saying "no" and outsourcing tasks that drain your energyHow societal expectations shape women’s roles before they even realize itThe significance of having honest conversations with your partner about responsibilityPractical steps for women to start using their voice and set boundariesThe ongoing need for women to prioritize themselves without guilt or apology
Connect with Dr. Heather England:WebsiteLinkedInSubstack (A Midlife Reckoning)WorkshopsResource PageSubmit a Podcast Topic
ResourcesThe Piggy Book by Anthony Brown
Time Stamps00:00 - Introduction to the unchosen hats women wear and mental load
00:16 - Heather’s background and the purpose of the episode
00:46 - The societal role model observed in the 70s and its lasting effects
1:13 - Personal story of growing up with the same expectations
2:09 - The societal expectations and invisible chores women carry
3:07 - Specific responsibilities women often manage daily
4:03 - How the mental load costs women more than just effort