257. why you can be loved and still feel unlovable (feat. dr. marisa franco)

why do some people struggle to accept love?? today’s guest is dr. marisa g. franco— a psychologist, author, professor, and friendship expert. she writes about how to build relationships with yourself and others for psychology today and has been a featured connection expert for major publications like the new york times, the telegraph, and vice.

in this episode, we talk about how our self-worth impacts our ability to love ourselves– and receive love from others.

we talk about:

01:38 how self-worth and relationships are tied together

05:16 how you can be loved but not feel loved

06:16 how memories become the database of your self-worth

08:50 external vs. internal validation

10:10 how to rewrite the memories that shaped you

14:20 supporting someone who can't accept your love

15:38 low self-worth and feeling misunderstood

18:46 how i found 1% of hope in recovery

20:50 what we get wrong about attachment styles