Saying “NO” to your toddler, football season & is LinkedIn the new dating app?!

This week on Two Parents & A Podcast, happy Wednesday!! You guys know we record same-day, which means we get to open with actual breaking news: Meta agreed to a $17 BILLION settlement in the child safety trial. Harrison dusts off his finance-guy trick for understanding any settlement (go straight to the stock price.. what it did tells you everything) and we get into what actually changes for kids: time restrictions and nighttime blockouts. And while we're being all professional and stuff lol, Alex shares how she beat her 2 AM heartburn after Prilosec, Tums AND Pepto all failed. The winner? Baking soda and water. (NOT medical advice.. she literally ate a bag of chips first as a strategy lol)

It's not until after ALL of this that we finally welcome you back to the episode :-) and Alex starts out hot. Backstory: she posted a TikTok about letting Tate wear her helmet and while mommy ALSO wears her helmet (red light mask).. and a comment saying "it's okay to tell her no" racked up over a thousand likes. So you're telling me a thousand people think we should say no to a toddler wearing a HELMET for fun?! Video two was born, the internet responded, and the ratio has spoken 💅 The real convo: we DO say no.. we just save it for safety and the impossible stuff, because a no used all day loses its luster. When Tate hears a real one, she stops in her tracks.

Other things on the home front: we're STILL shopping your Babylist registries AND we seem to be starting a little  etiquette corner?? We answered YOUR question about should guests ever do dishes!! 

Then it's officially FOOTBALL SEASON!! Our new fantasy twist: every Monday everyone in the crew individually picks a team to win, no picking the same team twice, and the most wins at the end takes home a prize. Plus Harrison makes his case for changing your fandom as an adult, and we give our official bar-vs-stadium ratio (there was immediate agreement, which never happens).

We take a minute for our queen, Dolly Parton 💛🌈 We love how she's being remembered, and the thing we can't get over is her philanthropic legacy.. 1 in 7 kids under 5 in the US gets a book in the mail from Dolly every month. We're excited to make a podcast donation to the Imagination Library in her honor.

We close with the internet section: Gen Z invented SILENT book clubs (you read alone together at a coffee shop until a timer goes off.. we wanted to hate it, we love it), LinkedIn is being used as a dating app and 22% of people have already tried it?! (Harrison's ruling: instant removal from the platform), the Reddit rule for DNFing a book guilt-free, the exact ages you age out of high school shows (25) and college shows (30), and Uber letting parents LIVESTREAM their teen's rides. And a BICKER OF THE WEEK years in the making: Harrison interrupting Alex's sacred workout-drive "banger time" means one thing.. Harrison officially needs his own car.

Hope everyone has a great week :-) LOVE YOU GUYS!

Timestamps: 

00:00:00 Welcome back to Two Parents & A Podcast!

00:00:07 Meta agrees to $17 BILLION settlement in child safety trial 

00:04:44 Home remedy for heartburn that ACTUALLY works (NOT medical advice lol)

00:06:02 Why we will ALWAYS welcome you back to the episode (manners!!)