207. How to Trust Yourself in Divorce: Stop Overthinking and Make Clear Decisions with Amy Armstrong

Divorce can make even the most confident person question every decision. When fear, conflicting advice, and financial uncertainty take over, how do you determine what is truly right for you?

Divorce can make even the most confident person question every decision. When fear, conflicting advice, and financial uncertainty take over, how do you determine what is truly right for you?In this episode of We Chat Divorce, Karen Chellew and Catherine Shanahan speak with Amy Armstrong, a nationally recognized expert in conflict resolution, parent coaching, mediation, and family systems. Amy is the founder of the Center for Family Resolution and the Center for Coach Development, as well as the author of *Real-Time Parenting: Choose Your Action Steps for the Present Moment* and the upcoming book *Boundary Basics: Simple Steps to Resolve Conflict*.

Drawing from both her professional expertise and personal divorce experience, Amy explains how to rebuild trust in yourself—one small decision at a time. She shares why repeatedly thinking through the same decision may signal a lack of self-trust and introduces a practical framework for placing decisions into three categories: yes, no, or later.

The conversation also explores how to choose support people who hold a positive vision for your future, set boundaries based on what you want to protect, and move away from language that keeps you feeling powerless. Amy, Karen, and Catherine discuss the connection between emotional regulation and financial clarity, especially when one spouse has significantly more financial knowledge than the other.

Amy also offers insight from her work training judges, including why family court outcomes can be unpredictable and why being brief, clear, prepared, and emotionally grounded can make a meaningful difference.

In this episode, you’ll learn:

How to recognize when you are not trusting yourself

Why practicing with small decisions builds confidence

How the “yes, no, or later” framework reduces rumination

What to look for in a genuinely supportive person

How to establish boundaries without trying to control someone else

Why financial clarity should come before major divorce decisions