i f*ing hate the wind: on control, chaos, and learning to let go

<p>I&#39;ve been thinking about wind. About chaos. About what happens when you spend your whole life trying to control everything.</p><p>There&#39;s a wind card in the Mystical Shaman Oracle deck, and every time I pull it, I think the same thing: I f*ing hate the wind. It represents chaos to me. The uncontrollable.</p><p>And I realized something this week. I&#39;ve been using over-preparation as armor. My way of trying to control everything so I never have to feel that out-of-control wind-in-my-face sensation.</p><p>I grip. I plan. I anticipate every variable.</p><p>But what that&#39;s actually done is keep me from trusting myself.</p><p>2024 was the year I resisted the crumbling. 2025 has been about learning to surrender.</p><p>I&#39;m standing at a threshold right now - between who I was and who I&#39;m becoming. And I&#39;m beginning to see the wind as an invitation to acknowledge how little I actually control. How much magic becomes available when I stop gripping so tightly and just trust myself to handle what comes.</p><p>Follow me on Instagram <a href="https://www.instagram.com/iamtinamelendez/⁠" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferer">@iamtinamelendez</a></p><p>Come sit with me in meditation. See my upcoming <a href="https://www.intuitive-soulutions.com/events" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferer">events</a> </p><p>Local to Annapolis? Come to the next <a href="https://momence.com/l/5ehz5o0D" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferer">Sacred Space Annapolis Women&#39;s Circle</a> or a <a href="https://momence.com/l/J1hRDnEW" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferer">New Year&#39;s Day Vision Boarding</a> Meditation</p><p>Join my mailing list: <a href="https://www.intuitive-soulutions.com/shadow-meditation">https://www.intuitive-soulutions.com/shadow-meditation</a></p><p>Stock Media provided by HotZtudio / <a href="https://www.pond5.com/?ref=signup647⁠" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferer">Pond5</a></p>