912. You are the chooser: How to date with self-worth + stop chasing the wrong people

Serena Kerrigan, author of Let’s Fucking Date, joins us for a candid conversation about relationships, self-worth, and the mindset shifts that can completely change the way you date. She gets real about going from chasing validation to knowing you are the chooser.

From the “three P” theory—potential, practice, or plot—to the two-drink rule, Serena shares how to make dating feel lighter, more fun, and less like a search for “the one.” We unpack red flags, the ick, pacing, standards, and why your time is a valuable resource.

We also talk about the difference between true self-worth + self-sabotage, why healthy relationships can mirror the parts of yourself you still need to grow, and how to stop projecting old heartbreak onto someone new. 

We also talk about: 

Why being single can be such a powerful season of self-worth + personal growth

The “Mirror, Mirror” practice + talking to yourself like your own best friend

Why we’re often attracted to people who reinforce what we believe we deserve

The three P’s of dating: potential, practice, or plot

How to tell the difference between the ick + an actual red flag

The two-drink rule, pacing, and protecting your time

How high standards can sometimes become limitations

The difference between a foundation list + a flex list when dating