Principles of Dating / Dr. Dennis Wilkening

<p>Dr. Dennis Wilkening opens by talking about his Harley Pan America that he brought into chapel. He uses motorcycle safety statistics as the entry point for a message on dating.</p><p><br></p><p>He argues that the same way most motorcycle accidents result from ignoring basic riding principles — speed, no helmet, no endorsement — most dating disasters result from ignoring what Scripture plainly says. He presents three riding principles that map directly to biblical wisdom about relationships.</p><p><br></p><p><strong>Scripture Texts</strong>Hebrews 12:1-2; Matthew 13:17; Psalm 84:11; Proverbs 4:23; Jeremiah 17:9</p><p><br></p><p><strong>Main Points or Ideas</strong></p><ul><li><strong>You go where your eyes go</strong> - In motorcycling, target fixation means the bike automatically steers toward whatever the rider&#39;s eyes fix on — including hazards. The same is true spiritually. Hebrews 12:2 calls believers to keep their eyes on Jesus; when Peter took his eyes off Christ and fixed them on the wind and waves, he sank. Wilkening urges students not to arrive at Bible college with their primary goal being to find a boyfriend or girlfriend. If your eyes are fixed on a person rather than on Christ, your dating life will end up a mangled wreck. Instead of concentrating on finding the right one, become the right one — cultivate a dynamic relationship with the Lord so that if God brings the right person, you are who you need to be for them.</li><li><strong>Don&#39;t trust your feelings</strong> - Countersteering is a motorcycle paradox: to turn left, you momentarily push the right handlebar, which leans the bike into the corner. It feels wrong, but it&#39;s the only way to navigate the corner safely. Spiritually, Matthew 13:17 reveals the same principle — feelings are the caboose, not the engine. Thoughts come first, then actions, then feelings. Students who spend all their time thinking and texting about someone will inevitably develop deep feelings for that person, and by the time others can see the relationship is a bad idea, the feelings are so engaged that wise counsel bounces off. Commit to following the Word of God before feelings get engaged, because once they do, it will be very hard to make a wise decision.</li><li><strong>Slow down</strong> - In motorcycling, &quot;slow is smooth and smooth is fast&quot; — slowing down in a corner gives maximum traction and a clean exit, setting up the straightaway. Rushing a corner costs traction and causes crashes. Wilkening commends students for a slower start to the year — building friendships rather than immediately pairing off. Psalm 84:11 promises that no good thing will God withhold from those who walk uprightly; if a relationship is God&#39;s will, he is not going to let it slip away because a student waited. Friendship first: grow socially, emotionally, and spiritually in genuine, selfless friendship before pursuing romance.</li></ul><p><br></p><p><strong>Conclusion</strong></p><p>Keep your eyes on Jesus, trust the Word over your feelings, and slow down. Dr. Wilkening reminds students that once they are in a relationship, they are no longer solo riders. What they do affects the person riding with them. Build the fundamentals now, and God can be trusted to do only good in his timing.</p>