Rage, Disclosure, and Raising Kids Through it All

Want to submit questions? Email us at hello@carlandlaura.comEvery couple in recovery hits the same three walls at some point. The rage that won't quit. The suspicion that there's more to the story. And the impossible question of how to protect your kids from the fallout of a parent who isn't showing up. In this episode of Lights On, Carl and Laura take on all three, pulled straight from the mailbag.The first: how do you deal with the raw, uncontainable anger you feel toward the person your spouse cheated with? Carl gets honest about why misdirecting rage at the affair partner is one of the most common and most damaging traps a betrayed spouse can fall into, and why the person who actually broke the vow is always the right target for accountability. Laura walks through what to do with the intrusive thoughts that show up unannounced, and the difference between validating a feeling and getting stuck in it.The second: is full disclosure actually necessary, or does bringing everything into the light just cause more pain? Carl and Laura make the case that nothing hidden can be healed, walk through what a real proper disclosure looks like, and get into why offering something like a polygraph isn't dramatic. It's the fastest way to remove the doubt that would otherwise haunt a marriage for years. Full disclosure isn't just for the person who broke it. It's for the person who needs to know they can finally exhale.The third: what do you do when you're the parent trying to lead your kids through healing and the other parent isn't participating? Laura gets direct about building a healthy village around your kids without recruiting them into your anger, the three truths every mom of daughters should be teaching in a season like this, and why the greatest gift you can give your children isn't your commentary on their other parent. It's your own health.Stay for the surgery analogy that will reframe how you think about partial versus full healing, the reminder that stacking new evidence doesn't require erasing the past, and the closer worth writing down: let their actions speak. Not your words.Follow Carl at: https://www.instagram.com/carllentz/Follow Laura at: https://www.instagram.com/lauralentz/Preorder our book, 'Overcoming Infidelity' TODAY: https://www.simonandschuster.com/books/Overcoming-Infidelity/Carl-Lentz/9781668230497

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