Kier Gaines: Solving the Crisis of Men’s Mental Health | Growth Mindset | E59

Men face unique challenges when it comes to talking about mental health, expressing emotions, and confronting toxic behaviors. As a result, they often turn to unhealthy refuges, like cheating, substance abuse, and the manosphere. 

In this episode, licensed therapist and renowned speaker Kier Gaines joins Tim to discuss his new book, It All Starts When You Do, which unpacks how to confront uncomfortable truths within yourself that are keeping you from happiness, peace, and fulfillment. He and Tim also talk about the cultural norms that encourage men to bottle up their feelings, the consequences of pretending to be strong, and actionable steps men can take today to get in touch with their emotions. 

In this episode, Tim and Kier discuss: 

(02:38) Growing Up Without Seeing Any Black Therapists

(06:11) Why Men Struggle With Holding Uncomfortable Truths

(11:04) Signs a Habit Has Turned Toxic

(13:58) Why Men Don’t Share Their Feelings With Their Wives

(17:39) Building Up Your Distress Tolerance

(21:07) Why People Cheat and How to Stop

(30:04) Blame vs. Accountability: Holding Yourself Responsible

(37:37) Accepting When You Aren’t the Best in the Room

(40:26) The Biggest Lies Men Are Believing Today