The Angry Therapist Podcast

← The Angry Therapist Podcast2 sept · 24 min

The resentment you don’t talk about will change your relationship

The resentment you don’t talk about will change your relationship2 sept24 min

I think resentment is one of the biggest things that can crack a relationship. We get hurt, minimize it, swallow it, and keep moving until all those little things start piling up. Eventually, the resentment becomes so big that we don't see the person or the relationship the same way anymore. 

In this episode, I talk about why we need to learn how to express ourselves before resentment turns into a giant pile, how to know what is actually worth bringing to the table, and why resolving resentment doesn't always mean getting an apology from the person who hurt us. 

I also talk about how to bring up resentment without blaming or attacking someone, taking ownership for my own part, and figuring out whether a relationship is still worth investing in. I break down the difference between doing life with someone, at someone, or around someone - and why honest relationships require us to be willing to talk about the hard shit. 

I talk about:

Why resentment can create hairline cracks in a relationship.

How swallowing small hurts can eventually turn into a giant pile of resentment.

Why I don't believe we can always depend on someone else to give us closure.

How to decide what is actually worth expressing.

Why I sometimes overexpress and need to work things out on my own first.

Why bringing up resentment should come from a place of response rather than reaction.

How taking ownership for my own part can change the conversation.

What someone's response to my hurt can tell me about their capacity for the relationship.