436: A Sophisticated Sanctuary — How to Decorate Our Home to Reflect Our Private Self

"Sophistication is a perfect marriage between intelligence and simplicity, combined with supreme confidence." —Rose Tarlow, interior designer, author of The Private House

A home that spontaneously prompts a deep exhale of relief and appreciation when we arrive. Four walls of our own that reflect what we need to unwind, put down any defenses or professional selves that we have needed to do our job. When we know we have such a place, no matter the size, but we know it is our own, our whole being can rest, can delight and can be free.

The caveat is that a home such as this doesn't just magically come together. In fact, even hiring an interior designer won't create this feeling of deep intimate calm that day after day, year after year, we feel innately. Rather, it takes intention, both in knowing ourselves and in knowing how to create the aesthetic combinations of colors, textiles, décor items, furniture and arrangement. The latter is what internationally respected interior designer, antiquarian and fine furniture and fabric creator Rose Tarlow can teach us. In her book The Private House published first back in 2001, she details, more accurately, journals her way through her thought process of decorating private homes for her clients, and herself and loved ones. The book was republished with updates in 2024, and I was fortunate to receive a copy after being inspired to explore the title by a long-time reader and member of TSLL community Deborah L. (thank you Deb!).

Rose Tarlow knows quiet luxury, even though she herself would never use the term. But to look at her projects of homes located in France (Provence), England (London) and in the States (Los Angeles), the fact that more than 20 years later they still look inviting, reveal her skill of timeless acquisitions, textile choices and arrangements.

Have a look at the quote below and her thoughts about the importance of creating, decorating a house so that it becomes our private house.

"Our private house should be a reflection of oursleves, our way of being in the world, what makes us distinctly different from one another. Taste is a matter of opinion and its nature is constantly seeking to define itself. So we are continually influenced by the people we meet, by what we read, and by what we see. Our opinions take shape, yet we are never fully formed, always becoming, incorporating experiences, continuously changing and refining our image of ourselves throughout our lives. This never-ending process of