"Are Your Students There for You, or Are You There for Them?"

Why did you become a band director?

Most of us would probably say some version of the same thing: we wanted to make a difference in students' lives through music.

But somewhere along the way, it can become easy to measure our success, and even our own worth, by ratings, trophies, performances, enrollment numbers, and how much we're willing to sacrifice for the program.

In this episode of Band Director Boot Camp, Lesley Moffat talks with band director Lincoln Rowe about a deeply personal journey that forced him to reconsider what it really means to be there for his students.

In 2019, Lincoln lost one of his students to suicide.

In the days that followed, he did what so many educators instinctively do. He became strong for everyone else. He helped his students navigate their grief, kept the program moving, and tried to hold everything together.

Eventually, he had to stop and ask who was taking care of him.

That experience began a much larger journey involving therapy, an ADHD diagnosis, confronting childhood trauma, and examining how much of his identity and self-worth had become wrapped up in being a successful band director.

One question from a mentor became especially important:

Are your students there for you, or are you there for them?

Earlier in his career, Lincoln had a list of accomplishments he wanted: performances, ratings, competitions, prestigious events, and experiences that would help build a successful program and résumé.

Eventually, he began looking at those same opportunities differently.