
← Hearts Entwined Podcast3 sept. · 26 min
Couples Therapy: Navigating Conflict, Infidelity & Healthy Communication - Lyn Smith & Keith Jordan
Lyn sits down with licensed clinical social worker and couples therapist Keith Jordan to explore what it truly takes to reconcile and sustain romantic partnerships. Drawing on four decades of mental health experience, Keith breaks down common relationship pitfalls—from communication breakdowns and infidelity to escalating retaliations—and offers actionable strategies to diffuse tension before it completely destroys trust.
Together, they unpack why active listening must replace defensiveness, how setting personal boundaries differs from controlling your partner, and why shedding rigid "shoulds" opens the door to genuine emotional growth.
KEY TAKEAWAYS
True active listening requires giving your partner full, uninterrupted attention rather than formulating a mental rebuttal while they speak.
Establishing boundaries should focus on identifying and expressing your own core needs rather than attempting to dictate what your partner should or should not do.
Take turns speaking/ listening - limit to 60 seconds to prevent overwhelming monologues which allows each partner to clarify meaning rather than make defensive assumptions.
Overcoming defensiveness begins when individuals realise that conflicts are not an attack on their character, instead it's opening the door for constructive problem-solving over blame.
BEST MOMENTS
"Listen to what they're saying from their point of view rather than preparing your rebuttal to what they're saying."
"A lot of argument... happens even though people are actually in agreement, but they don't realise that they are."
"Defensiveness often is... a reaction based on the person trying to assert that they're a good person, as if they're being accused of not being the right kind of person..."
"Concepts of what how things should be, you know, the world doesn't really operate according to should. It's a man-made construct, it's not really a spiritual concept at all."