⚽ El Sackio and the Man City Transfer Draft Punishment⚽

The Premier League is back (thank f*ck!) but the Man City cheating controversy rumbles on. We decide a way to punish them for their indiscretions.

Elsehwere we ponder which former Manchester City manager has the hairest bottom?

We check in with Spurs fan Bill off the back of a 1-1 draw between Spurs and Man United (AKA El Sackio)

And there's Cristiano Ronaldo's very bizarre press release.

Enjoy!

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