When Student Affairs Pros Become College Parents: Navigating Dual Roles

What happens when student affairs professionals become college parents themselves? The latest episode of "Student Affairs Voices from the Field" tackles this unique blend of personal and professional experience, yielding candid and relatable insights for anyone working in higher education—or embarking on the college transition with their own child.

Host Dr. Jill Creighton welcomes Dr. Gourjoine Wade and Miriam Khalil, both seasoned student affairs leaders, as they reflect on their experiences sending their own children off to university. Their stories illuminate the challenges, emotional dynamics, and surprising discoveries that arise when the boundaries between "the job" and "parenthood" blur in profound ways.

A core theme runs through the episode: The journey to college looks different for everyone, and no amount of professional expertise can fully prepare a parent for the emotional impact. Even though Dr. Gourjoine Wade had coached countless families through orientation, he shared that all of the professional advice went "blank" when it was his turn to drop off his daughter. Both Dr. Gourjoine Wade and Miriam Khalil note that their students—having grown up around campus life—were actually more prepared than many of their peers. This "insider knowledge" led to increased confidence for their children, demonstrating the subtle ways children absorb lessons from their parents' work.

Another important discussion centers on the balance between empowerment and involvement: how do you, as an expert, step back to let your own child take charge? Both guests emphasized the importance of encouraging independence, coaching their students through processes without taking over, and resisting the urge to leverage professional networks for shortcuts. It's about trusting the process—and the staff—just as they encourage other families to do.

The episode also confronts the role of privilege in the college journey, candidly acknowledging that not all families possess the same resources or insider knowledge. Dr. Gourjoine Wade and Miriam Khalil urge their student affairs colleagues to give grace to staff, offer support to fellow parents, and use their unique vantage point to enhance onboarding experiences for all.

Ultimately, this conversation shines a fresh light on how lived experience as a college parent can deepen empathy, inform more intentional practices, and bring both greater transparency and humanity to the world of student affairs.

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