If they wanted to, they would... wouldn't they?

In this episode, Julia explores the popular phrase “if they wanted to, they would”… and asks whether it’s really as straightforward as it sounds.

While acknowledging that behaviour can sometimes be a clear indicator of priorities, she challenges the idea that human actions are ever that simple. Drawing on psychodynamic thinking, Julia looks at how fear, shame, and unconscious patterns often override intention, meaning that what people do isn’t always a clean reflection of what they want.

This episode invites listeners to sit with a more uncomfortable truth: that human behaviour is often messy, conflicted, and driven by forces we don’t fully see or understand.

Because sometimes, “they didn’t want to” isn’t the whole story.

Here are the highlights of this episode:

(1.34) Moments where it is true

(3.27) He’s just not the into you

(4.47) Fear will override desire

(6.06) Where do you do this?

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