The science of behaviour change and addiction, with Tara Hurster

Most addiction advice is built for rock bottom. Tara Hurster says that misses the vast majority of people - the high-functioning drinkers, gamblers, and users who still have jobs, houses, and families, but know something is off. If you’ve ever wondered where “just a bit too much” becomes a real problem, this conversation gives you a clearer answer than shame ever could. Paul speaks with Tara Hurster, psychologist and founder of The TARA Clinic, about the low-to-high risk continuum of addiction, the 12 DSM criteria, and why “stopping” is not the same as changing. . Her approach is practical, non-judgmental, and built around helping people make real choices with real tools - not just white-knuckle their way through. Tara breaks down how tolerance, repeated failed attempts to cut down, negative consequences, and defensiveness can all signal a deeper issue, even when life still looks functional from the outside.

You’ll discover:

Why addiction can be invisible in high performers and professionals How the stages of change model explains denial, preparation, action, and maintenance The “stop you swap” trap and why focusing only on abstinence creates a void Why relapse is better understood as recycling, and relapse as a lesson How identity, values, and stress management drive the behaviours people keep repeating

Time Stamps

01:15 - Risk continuum and the question of where addiction begins

02:12 - The clearest signs: tolerance, failed attempts, and consequences

03:28 - Why questioning a behavior is already a signal worth taking seriously

04:23 - Stages of change and why defensiveness matters

05:34 - Why stopping is not the same as changing

06:32 - “If you stop, you swap” and finding the driver behind the behavior

08:34 - The myth that addiction only looks like rock bottom

09:49 - Only two DSM criteria are needed over 12 months