Ep 83. Teen Suicide, Mental Health and Grieving Patient Loss with Harvard Psychiatrist Dr. Zheala Qayyum

⚠️Content Warning: This episode contains discussions of suicide, mental health conditions and death. Listener discretion is advised. Please call or text 988 for support.

A child can look okay on the outside and still be struggling.

In this episode, Dr. Amna Shabbir sits down with child and adolescent psychiatrist Dr. Zheala Qayyum for an honest conversation about youth mental health, suicide prevention, parenting, perfectionism, and the emotional toll patient suicide can have on physicians.

Dr. Qayyum shares what she is seeing on the front lines of child and adolescent psychiatry, including the growing pressure young people face from social media, academics, world events, family stress, and the constant stimulation of modern life. She explains why parents should lead with curiosity, pay attention to subtle changes, and create a home environment where difficult conversations about mental health feel safe.

They also explore what happens when a physician loses a patient to suicide. Dr. Qayyum opens up about the guilt, self-doubt, and grief she experienced after losing young patients and why clinicians need support rather than silence after these losses. She also shares three important steps for physicians navigating patient suicide: acknowledge the loss, rebuild confidence, and give yourself permission to grieve.

In this episode, you’ll learn:

Talking about suicide does not put the idea in your child’s head. Asking directly can give them the language and safety to share what they are already thinking or feeling.Lead with curiosity instead of judgment. Saying, “I noticed something is different. What’s going on?” can open the door to a deeper conversation.Every behavior can be a form of communication. What looks like attention-seeking, avoidance, or a “mental health day” may be a child trying to express distress they do not yet know how to explain.Your job is not to protect your child from every uncomfortable experience. It is to support them as they learn how to handle stress, disappointment, anxiety, and setbacks.Physicians need space to grieve patient loss too. Losing a patient to suicide can deeply affect confidence, identity, and clinical decision-making, and clinicians should not have to navigate that grief alone.About Dr. Zheala Qayyum

Dr. Zheala Qayyum is a child and adolescent psychiatrist based in Boston, with faculty appointments at Harvard Medical School (HMS) and Yale School of Medicine. She completed fellowship training in child and adolescent ps