Can We Build an “Us” Without a “Them”? with John Green

Is it possible to build a community without a 'them'? Author, YouTuber, and podcaster John Green joins Brené Brown and Adam Grant for a wide-ranging conversation on belonging, friendship, and the systems that shape our lives. Together, they explore why sports can create such powerful communities, whether it’s possible to build an “us” without needing a “them,” and why shared projects can help relationships last for decades. John reflects on the challenges of young adulthood, what he learned from working as a hospital chaplain, and why supporting someone in pain sometimes means resisting the urge to fix it. The conversation also moves through why frictionless access, not just awareness, is essential to helping people get the care they need, the role coaches can play in athletes’ well-being, and John’s upcoming novel Hollywood, Ending.

Hollywood, Ending - John Green, September, 2026, hollywoodendingbook.com

CrashCourse - Hank Green & John Green, YouTube 

Demonic males: Apes and the origins of human violence - Wrangham & Peterson, 1996, Houghton Mifflin.

The Descent of Man, and Selection in Relation to Sex - Charles Darwin, 1871/1999, Project Gutenberg

Not Like Me = Bad: Infants Prefer Those Who Harm Dissimilar Others - J. Kiley Hamlin, 2013, Psychological Science

The Social Self: On Being the Same and Different at the Same Time - Marilynn B. Brewer, 1991, Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin

The Away End - Episode 1: John Green & Daniel Alarcon Dissect the 2026 World Cup Draw - The Away End, 2026, YouTube

Roger Bennett – Men in Blazers Media Network

Developmental Sequence in Small Groups - Bruce W. Tuckman, 1965, Psychological Bulletin

The Places That Scare You: A Guide to Fearlessness in Difficult Times - Pema Chodron, 2002, Shambhala

The Framework for Leading With Both Care and Accountability - Brené Brown, 2026, The Curiosity Shop with Brené Brown and Adam Grant