Episode 20 - What does ADHD Look Like in Fatherhood

Shane and Braden discuss becoming fathers before understanding their ADHD, describing the “gap” of parenting with shame, inconsistency, hyperfocus, and emotional dysregulation. They reflect on relief followed by grief after diagnosis, the harm caused by missed follow-through and angry reactions, and how kids experience outcomes rather than intent. They emphasize that diagnosis provides language and information but not a cure, and that progress requires using it through medication, therapy, community, and supportive partners; unsupportive relationships can deepen shame and damage. They explore generational patterns, coping mechanisms like alcohol or conflict avoidance, and the importance of apologizing, repairing, and modeling persistence rather than perfection. Be sure to check out the episode on the importance of therapy for neurodivergent fathers here: https://www.podbean.com/ew/pb-9bmi4-1a88d64

And if you are looking for support from men who understand your struggles, check out the Men's ADHD Support Group: https://mensadhdsupportgroup.org

You can find Shane at https://creatingorderfromchaos.com and you can find Braden at https://empoweradhdsolutions.com

00:00 Welcome to DadDHD00:30 Late Diagnosis Dad Guilt02:31 Hyperfocus as a Gift04:51 When Follow Through Fails06:04 Emotional Dysregulation RSD06:55 Shame and Masculinity Traps08:26 Getting Diagnosed Getting Tools09:50 Partners Healing or Wounding15:01 Breaking the Generational Cycle18:50 Repair Over Perfection21:10 Support Group and Legacy22:14 Final Takeaways and Outro