Dating, Relationships, and Disability

← Dating, Relationships, and Disability29 Sept · 47 min

262 - Roommates, Weddings, and Everything Between: The Friendship Series with Camille

262 - Roommates, Weddings, and Everything Between: The Friendship Series with Camille29 Sept47 min

In this episode of Kathy O'Connell's Friendship Series, Kathy talks with Camille, a close friend of nearly four decades, about their friendship and the role disability has played in it. They met in college, shared a wide circle of friends, and later lived together. Their lives stayed closely linked through marriage, family, and the college friend group they still share today.

Overview

In this episode of Kathy O'Connell's Friendship Series, Kathy talks with Camille, one of her closest friends. They met near the end of their freshman year at Le Moyne, about 39 years ago, and later lived together. Camille lived next door to their friends Lynn and Beth. Beth, Kathy's friend since 7th grade, is now Camille's sister-in-law: Camille met her husband John at Beth's wedding.

First Impressions and Disability

Camille, a quieter accounting major, remembers Kathy as bubbly, confident, and someone who seemed to know everyone. She briefly wondered what Kathy could do, like drive, but Kathy simply did it. Camille trusted her to ask for help when she needed it. The friends were often more upset by strangers' stares and comments than Kathy was. Kathy credits her parents for her confidence, especially their message that she might need to do things differently, but she could do them. A favorite shared memory is friends pulling and pushing Kathy up a steep hill on a shortcut home, laughing the whole way.

Dating

Kathy recalls how hard it was when she wanted a boyfriend and apologizes if Camille bore some of that. Camille says she remembers nothing bad. She had hoped someone would love all of Kathy, and eventually Scott did. Her advice is to be open, show who you are from the start, and keep putting yourself out there. She notes that dating is harder now that so much of it happens online.

What Makes It Different

Camille says the friendship is mostly like her others. The difference she values is that her kids grew up with "Aunt Kathy" and learned to see people's differences naturally. Kathy's speech can be hard to follow when she's emotional. Understanding her helped Camille with her son Jackson's speech impediment and taught her patience. Camille admits she once worried about Kathy holding her adopted son Jaden as a baby, but Kathy proved her wrong. Both agree that any new mother has those fears. Kathy also mentions that teenage Jaden sometimes gets embarrassed holding her hand in public, which Camille calls typical teen behavior.

Chosen Family

Camille's favorite memories ar