Ep. 70 Why isn’t therapy working?, unrealistic expectations, & relational healing

<p>“I’ve been in therapy for months and nothing’s fixed… am I doing this wrong, or is my therapist slacking?”</p><p>This question comes up <em>all the time</em> — online, in my personal life, and in my therapy office — and honestly, it makes me a little nervous to answer. Not because it’s wrong to ask, but because it touches on something tender, complicated, and often misunderstood about how therapy actually works.</p><p>In this episode, I’m leaning into the therapist side of me to talk openly about expectations, progress, and the therapeutic relationship itself — and why healing isn’t a service you purchase so much as a relationship you participate in.</p><p>We talk about:</p><ul><li>Why therapy is often framed as “I’m paying you, so fix me”</li><li>How our results-oriented culture shapes unrealistic expectations of healing</li><li>Why the <em>relationship</em> — not techniques or advice — is the biggest predictor of change</li><li>Therapy as a surrogate attachment relationship (and what that stirs up)</li><li>How idealizing or dehumanizing your therapist can stall progress</li><li>What mutual respect looks like in a relationship with a power imbalance</li><li>Why seeing your therapist as a real person can actually deepen safety and growth</li><li>What this doesn’t mean (you’re not doing therapy wrong, and this isn’t therapist blame)</li></ul><p>Even if you’ve never been in therapy, this episode applies to <em>any</em> relationship where growth happens slowly, imperfectly, and through connection.</p><p>FIND ME: </p><p>INSTAGRAM: <a href="https://www.instagram.com/theevergreenrx"><u>⁠@theevergreenrx⁠</u></a></p><p>TIKTOK: <a href="https://www.tiktok.com/@theevergreenrx"><u>⁠@theevergreenrx⁠</u></a></p><p>YOUTUBE: <a href="https://www.youtube.com/@TheEvergreenRx"><u>⁠@theevergreenrx⁠</u></a></p><p>WEBSITE:<a href="http://theevergreenrx.com/"><u>⁠ theevergreenrx.com⁠</u></a></p><p><br></p><p>For submitting questions or business inquiries, please email me at <a href="mailto:theevergreenrx@gmail.com"><u>⁠theevergreenrx@gmail.com</u></a></p><p><br></p><p>Disclaimer: Everything posted here is for educational or entertainment purposes only and is not a replacement for individualized medical or mental health treatment. Please reach out to a professional therapist or doctor if you are in need of assistance. Listener questions may be specific to one individuals life or an amalgamation of common experiences and dilemmas. </p>