
← Untethering Shame13 sept · 59 min
Shame & Loss: What Grief Taught Julie Lucas About Receiving Love
<p><br></p><p><strong>"I thought I knew what grief felt like."</strong></p><p>A year and a half ago, Julie Lucas' husband Tommie left for a work trip and never came home. What she found on the other side of that loss was not the grief she expected — it was the shame of grieving wrong, the guilt of feeling okay, and the strange loneliness of being surrounded by people who love you and don't quite know how to reach you.</p><p>In this episode, Julie and Kyira talk about the fear that stops most of us from grieving at all: that if you let yourself feel it all the way down, you will not come back. Julie found the opposite.</p><p>This is an honest look at what grief actually asks of us, and what becomes possible when we stop trying to do it the right way.</p><p>CHAPTERS</p><p>00:00 Cold open<br>00:49 Intro<br>04:34 "I thought I knew what grief felt like"<br>05:08 The somatic side of grief nobody warns you about<br>09:11 Who Tommie was<br>12:16 The morning it happened<br>15:46 "You're going to love it here. I feel so free."<br>20:41 The fear: if I feel it fully, I won't come back<br>21:48 Asking her mother to hold her<br>24:52 Protecting everyone else from your grief<br>25:27 "I don't want my identity to become this"<br>30:41 Grief has no timeline<br>39:14 The acoustic guitar emoji<br>48:40 Grief is a solitary journey we can't do alone<br>51:45 There's no right or wrong way to do this<br>54:39 Why "let me know if you need anything" doesn't work</p><p>MORE ABOUT JULIE</p><p>As an introverted overthinker, Julie knows what it's like to feel anxious and stuck in her head. She spent much of her footwear design career in critique mode, comparing her work with others and chasing trends.</p><p>She became a master of focusing on the outside world and, in the process, lost track of her body and its wisdom. A yoga nidra class that brought her back home to herself propelled her on a journey to learn and share this profound practice of meditation and self-inquiry.</p><p>CONNECT WITH JULIE</p><p>Website: <a href="https://www.withinwonder.com/" target="_blank" rel="ugc noopener noreferrer">https://www.withinwonder.com/</a><br>Yoga Nidra: <a href="https://www.withinwonder.com/yoga-nidra" target="_blank" rel="ugc noopener noreferrer">https://www.withinwonder.com/yoga-nidra</a><br>Work with Julie: <a href="https://www.withinwonder.com/individual" target="_blank" rel="ugc noopener noreferrer">http